Post by raqessarr on Mar 28, 2010 16:46:20 GMT -5
Hi everyone! I would GREATLY appreciate your advice, as I am quite unsure of exactly what the right thing to do is... so I'll start from the beginning.
I had budgies when I was little, and wanted to get a cockatiel as an adult after my childhood dog passed away. I picked a normal grey female who had a wonderful disposition and we immediately bonded. I also made sure she was well socialized with all my friends - and she really has become a very sweet and friendly bird.
I am in school and picked up a heavier school load, so I couldn't spend as much time with Rikku (the friendly hen), so I decided to accept the adoption of another cockatiel - Louie - who a lady I knew wanted to get rid of because she had a baby and was 'too busy'.
I figured they would enjoy each other's company, though now I admit I wish I would have considered the consequences of a bonding pair.
Louie was never as friendly as Rikku, and didn't know 'step-up', and lunged to bite if I put my finger down to pick him up. He quickly bonded to Rikku, though (they had equal sized separate cages a couple of feet away from each other).
I worked with Louie and he now can step-up, though only when he WANTS me to pick him up, really.., and lets me pet him sometimes on the top of his crest only (Rikku lets me pet her cheeks and around her eyes and mouth and neck like a sweety) and Louie will try to bite me if I pet him "wrong" or in the wrong place.
It has been a couple of years and they are very bonded and they try to mate and Rikku is now laying eggs. I do not know people who want any cockatiels and also am now aware that there are many unhomed cockatiels up for adoption - so I don't want to contribute to homeless cockatiels by letting them have babies - so I freeze the eggs and then put them back in the cage till she stops sitting on them.
I have figured out how to manage day/night cycle to help control her over-laying and also am supplementing her and all that, so I think I am ok on advice with her nutrition in that regard (and I have spoken to my vet and get her weighed whenever she looks thin).
Now here is the problem... Now, when I want to hold/play with/cuddle/pet Rikku, Louie HAS to follow right behind her, so he will jump on me too. Normally if I take turns petting them, and pet Louie's crest, it is ok, but often Rikku will be annoyed by this and try to pull Louie's crest to punish him for taking her individualized attention from me. So then Louie will be upset and take it out on me and try to bite me.
If he is in the cage and I am petting Rikku, he paces back and forth upset so this seems not right. Also, he never wants attention or petting from me in any way if I am not holding Rikku and petting her first.
Rikku seems very annoyed by Louie and the way he follows her constantly, and often it seems as though she is trying to get away when they are having "out of the cage free time" and he is incessantly chasing her. He doesn't seem to be too upset when she is out of the cage (if nearby) and he is in the cage, but this also seems just wrong in a way as though he is being punished.
Rikku doesn't like to preen or be preened by Louie, and she only likes physical contact with him for sex. She does not like to be too close to him, however will scream for him if they are separated too far or out of sight. When they are sharing a treat dish during out of cage time, he will over-burden the dish and stand on the edge of it, and sometimes will become territorial over it, and if I put two dishes sometimes that works but sometimes he will just follow her to whichever dish she is at and want to overburden it again.
I know it may be natural domination behavior, but Louie seems like he is incredibly mean to Rikku sometimes, and to me. I try to have alone time with Louie to establish a bond with him and me, and this works often short term, but in time he will again just want to focus all of his attention on harassing Rikku. If I take him to another room he will scream and scream and I know to wait it out so I do (as long as my roommates aren't home) and in time he will stop screaming and let me pet him and seems to enjoy it. But then as soon as he gets back in the room with Rikku it's back to overdominating, incessantly following, and harassing.
I am looking forward to getting my own place with my boyfriend in the not too distant future, so I will have more opportunity to separate them and spend individual bonding time without having to worry about pissing off roommates with screaming, however am still not sure that continuing this path is the best choice.
Also I should note that both seem happy with individual cages. They do not scream when it is time for them to go in their cages. They just step right down like good birds and then choose the perch closest to each other to sit on. At night when I cover them up they both do sweet little chirps and go right to bed.
#1 - I am worried about Rikku continually laying eggs her whole life and the eventual calcium effects or egg binding. Even though I supplement powder in her water to make sure she ingests the supplement, she is still much thinner than Louie and I have to give her a lot of almonds and millet to keep weight on her, and I am worried she isn't getting a well balanced diet.
# 2 - Is Rikku really happy with Louie? I understand the biological drive to want to reproduce - but other than that, she won't EVER preen him or allow him to get even close enough to preen her. And she LOVES when I preen/pet her, and HATES that he always tries barge in and interrupt. Why does she scream when they are apart but then not allow non-sex physical affection with him?
# 3 - Can I do something to make Louie less territorial in general especially with Rikku? He sometimes tries to lunge at me or discipline her for me picking her up.
I want to do what is best for both birds, but in all honestly Louie is a real pain in the BLEEP and not a good pet at all. I understand and respect life as an intrinsically valuable entity, not merely instrumental, and do not want to ever think of pets just as "what they do for me" and also know that I am the one that owe THEM as their owner. However, it is very frustrating having a pet who I can't seem to bond with, and who also doesn't allow me to spend the time I want (and the time she would like as well) with Rikku.
I would love to have two friendly birds who both like to be pet without jelousy, but am not sure if this is possible.
I really appreciate any advice or words of wisdom I can get. Please don't be mean! I realize it was dumb to take a boy with a girl if I didn't intend on breeding, but I was never informed of how incredibly horny they are, and had no idea what I was getting into. I remain adamant that I do not want them to breed - there is a parrot rescue organization close to me as well as petfinder.com with TONS of homeless cockatiels, and I don't want to haphazardly introduce a bunch of 20 year long life expectant hatchlings without a forever home already lined up for them. I don't want those hatchlings to end up in the same problem their parents are in as well, or end up getting re-homed a bunch of times because I convinced people to take a chic.
Thank you so much!
I just want a happy pet and myself to be a happy owner who knows she is doing right by her pets and also not getting bitten!!!
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